Saturday, July 19, 2014

Doing things a little differently


I've decided that instead of having the writing all out in the open the way it was, I'll put links to the drabbles. 
I think it will look more organized this way.  So it'll go a little bit like this when I post a writing update:




Here we go. I'm about to give you guys the first look at the novel I'm working on. I need you guys to tell me what you think. So far the story doesn't have a title, but if I had to name it right now, I'd call it Broken.



Peaceful days are so fragile. One minute everything is perfect, and the next you can be watching  the pieces of your life as they rain down around you, shattering as they hit the ground and fracturing in to even tinier, ungraspable pieces. That's when you know you can't get it back, the moment you know nothing will ever be the same. Today would be like that for Dominick Cole. It started like any other day, it always does, today a seventeen year old Dominick would be taking his little sister Zoey to the park to play. He'd wish in the days and years to come that he hadn't been trying to be a good brother for her sake. That he'd have done the typical teenager thing and refused to take his kid sister to the anywhere.
“Come on, Zoey. It's already past noon. Do you want to go to the park or not?” Dominick asked as he watched his little sister, waiting for her to finish, or rather to start eating her lunch. The little red head, clad in a princess dress, poked at her sandwich like it was toxic and turned up her nose. “Ugh, you can be such a pain.. what's wrong with it?” he asked, looking at it, admiring his craftsmanship. “Didn't I make it the way you wanted?” Fiery pigtails flew as she shook her head and he rolled his eyes. “What's wrong with it?” he asked again.
“The bread.” she said simply, pointing to the crust that Dominick had forgotten to cut off for her. He laughed under his breath.
“Of course.” he said as he took her plate and set it on the counter. “Sorry Zo, I forgot.” He said, as he rummaged through a drawer. “What shape should it be today? We got, Dinosaurs, hearts, or a star.” he said, holding up three sandwich cutters, each a different color. He watched his little sister and she pointed to the star cutter.
“Star.” She said happily.
“So spoiled.” Dominick grumbled playfully as he pressed the cutter down on to the sandwich, ridding it of it's crust and also cutting it in half in the same motion. Zoey just giggled and kicked her feet in reply, sipping her juice. Truth was, and Dominick knew it, he'd do anything his little sister asked of him in a heartbeat. To anyone else, Dominick looked like a typical delinquent. From the way he dressed, to the cold, low rumble of his deep voice and even farther the way a glare from his striking green eyes put the words 'If looks could kill' on a whole different level. He looked like the type of guy you'd never want to meet in a dark alley. Guys at his school had tried to challenge him constantly, wanting to fight with him to prove they were worth something. At each encounter Dominick would just raise an eyebrow and walk away without saying a word. He had no reason to fight idiots, besides, they didn't truly know him. He may look like a devil, but his heart was gold, he loved his family and what's more than the typical teenage boy, he would admit it. Sure, he may have played up the bad ass look a bit by choosing tight shirts that clung to his broad chest and spiking his dark hair so it stood up at all angles. That combined with the natural coldness in his eyes gave him an amazing edge. He had no idea where he had inherited the demon eyes from, it definitely wasn't his mother, who's eyes were about as doe like as they could be, and he was sure it wasn't his father, his father always had a far away look in his eyes. Dominick was just glad that Zoey wasn't afraid of him the way most kids her age were. Half of her class freaked when he picked her up. He liked to think that looking badass kept the other kids from even thinking about messing with her.
“Better?” he asked as he slipped the newly star shaped sandwich in front of Zoey, ruffling her hair and nibbling on a bit of the rejected crust. She nodded and picked up half of the star and finally began to eat her lunch. He laughed softly, leaning against the counter as he watched her. In his pocket his phone chirped and he glanced at the screen before answering it with a raised eyebrow. “I've got everything under control, Mom.” he answered, annoyed.
“Just checking,” his mother replied on the other end. “We should be home at around nine, so you'll have to put Zoey to bed for me. Make sure she get's a bath and brushes her teeth.” Dominick imagined his mother on the other end, ticking off a mental list of all the things she'd forgotten to tell him and couldn't help but laughing.
“This isn't the first time I've watched her. I've got this. Relax, Mom, just enjoy the rest of your trip. How was the convention?” He asked, shouldering the phone as he tossed the sandwich cutter in the sink, he heard it land in the soapy water with a soft splash. He halfway listened as his mom went on about the Nursing convention and how she'd gotten a new certification and blah blah blah. It was fascinating, really. He glanced over at Zoey, who had finished her sandwich and he covered the receiver. “Good girl, finish your juice.” he said, then went back to the phone. “Sorry, she's just finishing her lunch.”
“Just now?” Dominick could hear his mother doubting his babysitting abilities.
“It's because I forgot to cut her crust off, jeeze, Mom, give me a break here.” He grumbled. “I'm going to take her to the park after she finishes her juice and changes out of that princess dress.” He added giving Zoey a pointed look that earned him a pout.
“Well.. Alright, but be careful.” his mother said, and he could hear someone in the background calling  her name. “Well, I've got to go, the next session is starting. Have fun, and be safe. Love you guys.” She blew a phone kiss before hanging up.




This is just the opening. Poor Dominick's life is about to get massively turned upside down. Let me know what you guys think!


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